The Reality Of Reality (1/2)

Opinion Piece: Purely just my ideas, I will be using "me" and "I" but that's just to allow this piece to function and flow, it has zero connection to myself or anyone.

Today I tag you in with a question, are you someone else? I am pretty sure that I am myself, with my own emotions, thoughts, ideas, tastes, likes, dislikes, and self fulfillment. I am fairly certain that you are the same, you might prioritize different parts of your life then me, but on a basis we all have similar things stemming from our self. I said things because I do not know what to put there, it is more then emotions, though that might be the closest answer, but it includes liking how brownies taste vs disliking how they taste.

A belief I hold is that every single person has an equally legitimate reality, no matter what it involves. This might be one of the hardest parts about connecting with people, or empathizing. The goal with empathizing in my mind, is to feel what they are feeling, to understand it. I also believe that we can never reach this goal, we can come close, so close, which can be tremendously helpful, but understanding what someone is feeling fully takes you being them. I find it interesting that in different cases of reality differences, different responses are used. If I said that I do not like goldfish, and then you said that you did, would you try and change my opinion? I highly doubt it, it is most likely of no matter to you, and does not affect you very much, if at all, and is something that I can also almost certainly work through easily.

If I said that I was a bad person, and you believed that I was a good person, I feel as though the majority of people would respond by saying that I am a good person. That is a good feeling in of itself, that when someone feels bad, it is a natural inclination to try and help them, even if we do not know them well. Purely me saying I am a bad person, and you responding with "No, you are such a good person" is something that I think is a double edged sword. It shows care, but it directly defies my reality. If I truly think I am a bad person, then you saying the opposite of it, can inflict feelings of little connection with you, that you do not know the actual me, that I am crazy for my inability to see it, or in other words my reality is not real.

What I do think is much more helpful is not defying my reality, but putting in new anchors that I can grab on to. Giving examples of times I have done something well, telling me the truth, asking questions, not defying, not yelling, not doing anything to make me feel that my feelings are wrong to feel. These new things, like giving examples of good things I've done, small encouragements or compliments to me, these are different, then absolute statements that go against how I feel.

They very well may not have been part of my reality before, I could easily have never thought of them due to their specificness, and the natural hardness in seeing them as the doer. This makes them not defy anything, but instead have the effect of being able to change from the inside how I feel. They very well may not do something for a long time, or at all, though they also might help in a small or large way, right away, or down the line, depending on what it is I am feeling. They can protect against getting hurt more by not making me feel crazy, or not connected with the world, because in the end each persons reality is there reality. It has a legitimacy that is equal to each other persons, and so by inducing not a statement that goes against their reality, but instead is new to it, protects against feelings of disconnection, yet still allows for your ideas, feelings. and beliefs to be passed on to others.