How to Eat Food

An emptiness rots your insides. The intimacy and love within your heart, the frustration, and anger which normally never leaves your mind, the tiredness that causes your eyelids to droop face are all eclipsed by this one hole. You know your last bits of energy must be consumed to stave off this chasm, but what can you do? Your mind is littered with memories of each elixir: their location and flavor. Spicy, laying in the cabinet, creamy, bottled up, fruity, touching the air showing their color to god, salty, contained by a plastic wrapping. You don't have the energy to cook but you want something hot. These sorts of conundrums rattle your mind. And so you are here, to learn how to satisfy your hunger.

The Seven Steps of Meal Making

Deliberation: You must look inside yourself and seek the size of this stomach depression. Is it time for a full meal or merely a snack? While contemplating this question you cannot only think about the now but also the future, for if you have a planned meal soon you may only need to stave off the pains for a brief while. Once you know what your growling truly means you can move on.

Imagination: You need to figure out what flavors you are looking for if any in particular. If you are near starvation this step may be skipped. Assuming you have a variety of options the questions of hot or cold, salty or sweet and so forth need to be solved. Within this step, one should imagine a mental picture of their pantry, fridge, and other food locations to figure out how many options they have for each food category and decide if that affects their original food division choice.

Quest: You must enter your kitchen and look through all your food drawers for what you imagined. This is the scariest step because if you find you are missing a food you thought you had a sorrow like no other may emerge. If this occurs seek the nearest treat immediately, preferably ice cream, a flour-based dessert, or candy, and eat it as fast as you can, then you may continue with your food journey. If you do find what you were looking for you can take it out and put it on the nearest table.

Reflection: You need to think about the choice you are about to make. Are you really willing to wait this long while the pizza bagels cook or would you rather just have the ready to go cheese and crackers? Make sure to ask yourself if this food still seems appetizing to you. This step is crucial in shaping a happy meal so you do not look back with longing eyes on what could have been.

Plating: This step varies from person to person but you need to decide if you want to put the maximum or minimum effort into your meal. Do you plate it like Gordon Ramsey or choose to eat the mac and cheese out of the pot? A personal decision.

Additional: One has to think if they want a side, be it a drink, or some chips with their main meal. This is the last chance to get more food before you sit down and eat. Remember, a drink can fill you up just as much as food.

Love/Scarf: Eat, and do whatever else you want so long as munch. A joy should rush through your bones and all those problems in your life before sitting down for your meal will vanish as your saliva hugs those chicken nuggets, or whatever else you eat.